On Sat, 05-14-05 9:17 am
I failed to answer one of Candleman’s questions in my earlier post on Obsessive-Compulsive Spirituality, so I thought I’d do that now. Responding to him will entail another idea that came to mind as I re-read his comments and my response. Here’s the question he asked (after reading Hisstory and Mystory as well as my testimony):
Are you conforming to the world when you listen to Pink Floyd, Jimi Hendricks, and Led Zeppelin as you state in your blogger profile? (This is a serious question and I am not trying to be judgmental at all on your music tastes.)”
(I very much appreciate his spirit, i.e., seeking not to give offense or be misunderstood.)
Candleman, it would seem, is that most dreaded of all blog readers: he pays attention and catches me in apparent contradictions. Fortunately (for me), I can “wiggle” my way out of this one.
How does one reconcile walking in the Spirit with listening to Pink Floyd, Jimi Hendrix, Led Zeppelin, or – even – Eminem? How can we claim to abide in Christ, watch movies like Pulp Fiction, and laugh when Travolta accidentally performs brain-salad surgery in the backseat of a car? Or even when we’re engaged in apparently innocuous activities like giving your dog a bath or sorting the mail?
Well, if you’re OCS, you can’t. You can try to “see Christ in your dog” or ask “how would Jesus read the mail?” to maintain a semblance of being spiritual, but when it comes to my kind of music, movies, and other activities you’ve got a real problem. You have to conclude that you’re indulging your flesh and have supplanted the Holy Spirit in the throne room that has become your life.
But without OCS – and here comes the additional idea alluded to previously – it’s not really a problem. It is something to be aware of and alert to but not something to ring your hands about or change into sackcloth over.
For me, walking in the Spirit is like walking with my wife. Now, if I’m OCH (Obsessive-Compulsive Husbandry), I’m going to be walking with her but my mind is going to be constantly asking the following kinds of questions:
Am I holding her hand properly? Is there enough pressure in my grip? Too much? Should we interlock fingers? What Would Jesus Do?
“Is she enjoying this? Would she rather I not hold her hand? Should I ask? Will she think I’m insecure if I do ask?
“Am I walking too fast for her? Too slow?
“Am I leading her? Does she perceive me as a spiritual leader when we walk? How would Christ do this? Is there a verse that applies here?”
And so on. If I were to do this with her, my wife would probably ask me why I’m not talking, why I look distant, why I look so unhappy or worried. I would wonder why she’s not as spiritual as me: she seems to just be walking! Not much of an enjoyable time for either of us.
A normal walk, however, whether with my wife or with Christ, is quite different. Instead of being preoccupied with whether or not I’m “doing it right,” I just enjoy the moment. Enjoy the time with her/Him. Smiling, laughing, listening, talking, playing, working, eating – whatever. I live in my body – my senses – and put my mind on autopilot. Silent autopilot. I trust the Holy Spirit to set off a warning light or bell if something’s up.
It’s not much different when I listen to Pink Floyd or watch Pulp Fiction. I listen or watch with Jesus. We talk about it. I enjoy His creation: the musicians, the actors, the director; I marvel at the creativity He has given to people, the beauty of art. I also hear and see the suffering and painful existence of the more talented, thoughtful artists, recognizing and understanding – as well as remembering – what life without hope in Him is like: the search for relief or answers or someone that will make life seem worth it. Resorting to drugs, alcohol, pronography, or any handy escape when necessary. Anything to manage pain.
Back when I was OCS, I didn’t enjoy creation much and I didn’t enjoy God’s human creatures at all. Now I do: I am part of it and one of them. I am human. They are my kinsmen according to the flesh. I hurt for them sometimes and wish I could talk to them. Maybe share the gospel, but mostly just talk about what they think and their pain and their search and their dreams and . . . about their life. A Francis Schaeffer kind of talk. Loving, not condescending or preachy.
Life is alive now. I live it; I don’t just observe it. I (hopefully) view it from an eternal perspective (hence, the name of this blog) but I don’t just think about the “there and then”; I think about the “here and now,” too. It reflects and reveals God to me, now that I have eyes to see, ears to hear, a heart to feel, and a mind that filters without shouting down everything else.
Mike, thanks for naming the pain of so many ofus who share similar journeys.
Hi Mike,
I appreciate your in depth answers to the questions I have posed. I really like the analogy you gave about taking a walk with your wife and exhibiting OCH, and how the walk is neither enjoyable for yourself nor your wife. How true, also when we are engaged in OCS with our walk with Christ. Over the years I have learned to chill out and keep it real, but also keep the faith… and that is where I am, and for me, its a good place to be.
{{{Candleman}}}
I appreciate the freedom you express to enjoy these things, but something still seems amiss here. Paul said he “put away the childish things…” It is not a question of obsessive-compulsive, but of love. I used to love those groups, even played them in a band. But becoming a Christian it all changed- not because it was a ‘no-no’ to listen, but because the veil dropped and I recognized its godlessness and ugliness- “What do light and darkness have in common?”
Admittedly, if I heard them on the radio or in public I would enjoy it very much because I believe they had some very good stuff. But if I were to buy them again and listen to them all the time it would grieve me and bring me down. Not from OCS, just the spirit of the stuff.
We can still enjoy non-Christian music and I listen to Beethoven and Brahms now! There is no decadence, no God-dishonoring words, and pure genius.
All that being said, I appreciate your thoughts on the freedom, and it is good for me to hear. I can apply in other areas.
A great article, I love the OCH stuff, but I do agree with Rick. I find that when I spend too much time listening to or watching trashy stuff, it leaves me feeling dirty and I need to wash the residue away. This is not so much a Christian vs secular thing as it is a subject matter thing. And I think what affects people is different too (according to their weaknesses and what God is dealing with them right now). Paul says he could eat meat offered to idols, but wouldn’t do so in front of others who it might make stumble.
You can watch Pulp Fiction, and I might be able to watch something that you would find disturbing, but if together, we would find something we could both appreciate. And that’s the “walking in the spirit” bit for me — adjusting what I do according to the situation, the people I am with and the impact it will have on me — rather than on rigirous rules that may miss the point (and the season of life).