Eternal Perspectives

While researching and writing my series on divorce and remarriage, I came across another of those troubling passages from the lips of Paul wherein he sounds so, well, unspiritual. The more recent passage was from 1 Cor 7 where Paul addresses various issues concerning sex in marriage, desertion, and divorce. In v. 15 of that chapter he says,

“But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.”

As I explained in the series, Paul did not recognize desertion as a legitimate means to divorce one’s partner. He did, of course, realize that it happened all the time in Greek society and that it happened to Christians married to unbelievers. He addresses the problem in 1 Cor 7.10-15. Had I been writing on the subject, I would have gone to the trouble to demonstrate that desertion wound up being a valid ground for divorce because it inevitably led to emotional and material neglect, two grounds for divorce which Paul did support (but did not encourage).

But Paul doesn’t do that. Paul simply says, almost with a shrug of his inspired shoulders, “God has called you to peace.” In other words, let it go and move on.

This seems distressingly unspiritual me. I would have thought the apostle would have thrown in some stuff about praying and seeking God’s will on the matter and examining yourself to make sure you hadn’t done something to cause the partner to leave. But he doesn’t. He just says, sort of, “Oh, well.”

He does the same thing just a few chapters later in his letter to the Corinthians.
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Having reviewed critical aspects of the question of divorce and remarriage in previous posts (see “Series” above), it now remains to present my own position on this all-too common occurrence in Christendom. In this post I will offer what I believe to be the biblical teaching regarding

1. the grounds for divorce,
2. what porneia means in the context of Jesus’ debate with the Pharisees,
3. Paul’s teaching concerning desertion,
4. whether or not divorced people can remarry, and
5. what the New Testament emphasizes.

This is not merely an academic or theoretical issue for me: as a Christian counselor, I am frequently asked what the Bible teaches on the twin subjects of divorce and remarriage. I realize that some people will be influenced one way or the other by what I tell them; hence, it is imperative for me to have a biblical understanding of this important teaching concerning one of God’s institutions.

Also, and more personally, it is my 25th wedding anniversary as I write this. Were it not for my wife’s commitment to God, it is unlikely that we would have made it ten years, let alone twenty-five. But because of her determination (and, to a lesser extent, my own) we have remained together and undoubtedly glorified God: more than a few angels must be scratching their heads and praising God that we stayed together out of love for Him more than for love of one another!

As I have stated previously, my views have been influenced and honed by my reading of David Instone-Brewer’s Divorce and Remarriage in the Bible. His research has confirmed some of what I had already believed and broadened my perspective in other areas. All quotes, unless otherwise indicated, are from his book.

1. Biblical Grounds for Divorce

Although opinions on what qualifies as legitmate reasons for divorce range from no grounds to divorce for just about any reason, the teaching of the Bible indicates that there are four legitimate grounds for divorce:

1. adultery,
2. desertion,
3. emotional neglect, or
4. material neglect.

Adultery. Immorality is a legitimate basis for divorce based on Jesus’ teachings in Mt 5.32 and 19.9. In both of these statements by Christ, the word porneia is used; this will be discussed below. Infidelity, combined with a lack of repentance by the sinning partner, allows – but does not require – the innocent spouse to divorce.

Desertion. Paul does not recognize desertion as a legitimate method of divorce, a practice that was the only thing necessary to divorce in Greek culture. But, in 1 Cor 7.10-15, he does say that an irreversible separation creates a situation wherein divorce is allowed. Christians are never to desert their spouses – not even unbelieving spouses – but are commanded to remain single if they do separate and always to seek reconciliation with their partner. If desertion does happen to a believer, (whether deserted by a believer or an unbeliever), the remaining, believing partner is allowed to divorce since “God has called us to peace” (1 Cor 7.15).

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To make things easier, I’ve placed a button named “Series” at the top of my home page. This will make it easier for those of you wanting to access some of my older, longer posts.

Having explored the historical and cultural contexts of the first century c.e., as well as the teachings of both Jesus and Paul, this fourth post will examine the understandings and applications of the church at the present time. Much of the material will be drawn from Divorce and Remarriage: Four Christian Views, edited by H. Wayne House.

Four Views

House develops his book along four different approaches to the matters of divorce and remarriage:

No Divorce, No Remarriage;

Divorce, No Remarriage;

Divorce and Remarriage for Adultery or Desertion;

Divorce and Remarraige for a Variety of Reasons.

1. The first position – no divorce, no remarriage – is argued by J. Carl Laney. He believes that “marriage was designed by God to be permanent unto death, and that divorce and remarriage constitute the sin of adultery.” He begins his discussion by establishing a theology of marriage and offering a definition:

“While many have thought of it merely as a legal agreement, the Bible reveals that the marriage union involves much more . . . marriage could be defined as God’s act of joining a man and a woman in a permanent, covenanted, one-flesh relationship.”

Laney understands Deu 24.1-4 to be a concession, not grounds for divorce; further, he finds there a basis for disallowing remarriage in the event of a divorce. Of Jesus’ exception clause in Mt 19.9, he interprets the phrase as referring only to unlawful marriages:

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